Vintage

Is it just me, or are fast-food joints slowing down big-time? I’m definitely no junk-food-every-day kinda guy, but my experiences of late leave a lot to be desired. The last three times I’ve been to a fast-food place, my order has taken more than fifteen minutes to get into my hands. In fact, once it took twenty-seven minutes to get my food. TWENTY-SEVEN MINUTES?!? I may as well have cooked it myself!

Now, this is more than just a consumer rant. It’s business. Fast-food companies’ business models are based on efficiency and quick turnaround times (very much like low-cost airlines). People choose to eat fast-food (versus going to a restaurant) for the cost, convenience, and speed factors. The equation is pretty simple: Faster service = more customers served in a given time = more sales = more profit. You might think “Well, they’re not losing customers, so it’s not really that big a deal for them.” The thing is, they are, and big-time. I’ve watched people (not individuals, but handfuls of people) leave the queue, turn around, and walk out. And that’s that, they’ve lost their business that night, and potentially down the line as well.

I can only imagine that this nonchalance is due to arrogance, and the belief that they can’t be hurt. In the tough times the world has been facing, many people have turned to fast-food, so it’s one of the few industries that hasn’t been completely shelled in the last 18 months. Fast food is often cheaper than cooking a decent meal at home; and people have also had to work harder to keep their jobs/salaries, and this has left less time for home cooking. So they pop out and buy a quick, cheap bite instead. The thing is, eventually people will get fed up with bad service at a particular outlet, and decide to go somewhere else. Enough people do that, and that outlet is out of business. From personal experience in the US, Europe and Asia, customers expect their food in three to four minutes max. It’s called fast food for a reason, isn’t it? In their cases, if waiting time gets to ten minutes, you just know all hell will break loose in the store (especially in the US). Fifteen minutes? Somebody’s gonna get docked salary or fired. And twenty minutes? You know head office is gonna hear about it, and that’s a hammer blow to the franchise (think sanctions, fines, revocation of rebates, audits, on-the-spot dismissals).

But here in SA? “Sorry sir, I can’t speed it up, your food is on its way.” And the culprits? No, it’s not you’re aunt-and-uncle grease hole around the corner. In my case, it’s been KFC twice, and McD’s once. These are the big guys, the pro’s, the cornerstones of the industry. If they keep it up, though, I’m going somewhere else next time…